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Retro Columns




WWF ROYAL RUMBLE PPV @ Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, MI...S 1/25/09
Posted on: 01-25-2009

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>>caption:  RVD BACK IN THE WWE<<

@ JOE LOUIS ARENA:

    The Age of Orton ruled the Royal Rumble
and Battle Creek's Rob Van Dam made a WWE
surprise return Sunday night at The Joe.
    Here's how the pay-per-view went.....

>>>     ECW Champion Jack Swagger clean-pinned former champ Matt Hardy
in their title rematch via a gut-wrench power-bomb.

>>>     Melina flip-rolled Beth Phoenix to capture the Women's Championship
and end the five month reign lof the Glamazon.

>>>     John Cena FUed JBL to retain his Raw world title. The finish came after
Bradshaw's "employee" Shawn Michaels had given Sweet Chin Music to both JBL
and Cena, then draped Brashaw's arm across Cena's chest during a ref bump
of Mike Chioda. HBK then exited and when second ref Jack Doan ran in, Cena
kicked out at the two-count.

>>>     Edge regained the Smackdown world title, his 7th W-C'ship, by getting
help from an unexpected source. SmDn GM Vickie Guerrero added No-DQ stips
to the bout and Edge was assisted by Chavo Guerrero during the match against
defending champ Jeff Hardy. Jeff jumped off a ladder to send Chavo Jr. through
the ECW announce table to end that threat, but Matt Hardy arrived and (after
teasing he'd help Jeff) chair-shot Jeff for Edge's cover.

>>>     Even though he remains under threat of sanctions from the McMahon
Family for his attack on Vince McMahon last week on Raw, Randy Orton won the
Royal Rumble Battle Royal to earn an automatic title shot at WrestleMania XXV.
    After The Big Show and The Undertaker eliminated each other, the Final Four
were Legacy and Triple H. The Game ousted both Ted DiBiase Jr. & Cody Rhodes
before getting jumped from behind by Orton and last-eliminated with a toss to
the floor.
    The complete R-Rumble Recap:

#1   Rey Mysterio vs #2 John Morrison began the match.
#3   Carlito entered.
#4   MVP entered.
#5   Great Kahli entered.
#6   Vladimir Kozlov entered.
                                                                     #1  Kahli was ousted by Kozlov.
                                                                     #2  MVP was eliminated by Kozlov.
                                                                     #3  Carlito was tossed by Kozlov.
#7   Triple H entered.
                                                                     #4  Kozlov was dumped by Triple H.
#8   Randy Orton entered.
#9   JTG won a coin toss with Shad and entered.
#10  Ted DiBiase Jr. entered.
#11  Chris Jericho entered.
#12  Mike Knox entered.
#13  The Miz entered.
                                                                     #5/#6  Miz & Morrison were double-tossed by 3H.
#14  Finlay entered.
#15  Cody Rhodes entered.
#16  Undertaker entered.
                                                                     #7  JTG was eliminated by Undertaker.
#17  Goldust entered.
                                                                     #8  Goldust was ousted by brother Rhodes in 1:11.
#18  C.M. Punk entered.
#19  Mark Henry entered.
#20  Shelton Benjamin entered.
#21  William Regal entered.
                                                                     #9  Henry was eliminated by Mysterio.
#22  Kofi Kingston entered.
                                                                     #10  Benjamin was eliminated by Undertaker.
#23  Kane entered.
                                                                     #11  Regal was ousted by Punk.
#24  R. Truth entered.
#25  Rob Van Dam entered.
#26  The Brian Kendrick entered.
                                                                      #12  Kingston was eliminated by Kendrick.
                                                                      #13  Kendrick was eliminated in 15-sec by 3H.
#27  Dolph Ziggler entered.
                                                                       #14  Ziggler was tossed by Kane in 21-sec.
#28  Santino Marella entered.
                                                                       #15  Marella elim by Kane in a R-record 1s.
#29  1st RRumble winner Hacksaw Duggan entered.
#30  The Big Show was the last entry.
                                                                      #16  Hacksaw was ousted by Big Show.
                                                                       #17  R. Truth was tossed by Big Show.
                                                                       #18  Punk was eliminated by Big Show.
                                                                       #19/#20  Mysterio & Knox double-tossed by TBS.
                                                                       #21  Finlay was eliminated by Kane.
                                                                       #22  RVD was tossed by Y2J.
                                                                       #23  Jericho was eliminated by U'taker.                        
                                                                       #24  Kane was dumped out by Legacy.
                                                                       #25  Orton RKOed Big Show off the apron.
                                                                       #26  Undertaker was pulled out by Big Show.
                                                                       #27  DiBiase was tossed by Triple H.
                                                                       #28  Rhodes was dumped out by Triple H.
                                                                       #29  Triple H was tossed by WINNER Orton.

LEAST TIME IN THE RUMBLE:                  Marella, 1-sec, a new record.
LONGEST TIME IN RUMBLE:                    Triple H, 49:24. (in 7th, out 29th).
MOST ELIMINATIONS:                             Triple H & Big Show, six each.
MOST CONSECUTIVE ELIMINATIONS:     Five by Big Show right after he entered.


PPV FEARLESS FORECAST:     3-&-2.

CK REVIEW:   The most boring R-Rumble ever. While most of the main eventers entered early
to mid match to keep them in longer, much of the time was spent aimlessly walking around
the ring. Legacy 3-on-1 vs The Game was entirely too predictable. Big Show was so blown up
he looked like he might pass out before the finish, even though he entered last. RVD's surprise
entry produced the biggest pop of the finale. Umaga was backstage. Why wasn't he a surprise
entry instead of blink-&-they're-gone spots by Santino, Kendrick & Ziggy?
    Nobody cared about the first two bouts. There were some stiff shots in the ECW bout
and some missed moves in the ladies encounter.
    Michael's kick of JBL was well received, but because Bradshaw didn't win, we'll get more
"The Wrestler" storyline until Mickey Rourke does a cameo at W'Mania.
    The Edge/Jeff Hardy no disqualification match had very little interference and outside the
ring action and no blood. It too was boring at times, but was saved by Matt's turncoat finish.
Jeff's mistimed ladder leap almost cost him both his knees.
    Much anticipation and then disappointment when Christian failed to make an appearance.

GRADE:   C Plus.

COACH KURT

                                                                     ###    

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